Hey, remember me?

Hello all,
I know, I know it's been awhile. I've been swamped with school work and when I wasn't hitting the books, I was just too burnt out on thinking to exert any effort into this bad boy.

I've been putting some thought into what my next big blog entry will be...I've been working on/mentally laying out something involving television shows on the air right now...but there are a few interesting movies coming out around now so I'm thinking I may just scrap my TV show idea and do some research on those flicks. Basically, calm down and stay tuned.


I do, however, have a literary snack for you; this poem is something I performed at an open mic night at my school in January and at a Youth Speaks open mic in December. I'm working on a new one right now, but I think posting it before I perform it is just bad karma....

Redemption With a Side of Grace

Sometimes I look at pictures of you and I can imagine myself in the frame

You and your friends

My old friends

It’s like I can smell through the matted paper

Smoke soaked into your hair, skin and clothes

Cheap beer on the breath, weed under the finger nails

Tattoos carelessly etched into your skin

Metal bars pushed through every orifice

They lack meaning

Like I did when I was there

A couch potato in the worst of forms

Breathing in and out the days like cigarettes

Unappreciative of the momentary high

Just waiting for next buzz

Young and feeble of free will

Impressionable

It’s scary to think of myself in your pictures

Old and worn at the age of 19

Smokers skin, drinkers gut, and god knows what else

You seem happy

Intoxicated by whatever you’re on

Maybe it’s nothing

Maybe it’s everything

All I know is I’m creating new pictures now

Pictures filled with motivation

Etched with goals

Framed with tenacity

All I know is I’m happy now

And this smile is not just another fake smile for your frame

And it’s all fun and games

And it’s all work hard play hard

And it’s all redemption with a side of grace

Are you jealous?

Are you surprised that I got better when I deserved worse?

Does your heart dip a little ?

Because mine does

Sometimes I can only think of the bad, and I want to cry because I know there was good

Sometimes I think of my tears and I want to laugh because they were so insignificant

Sometimes I miss you, but mostly I dismiss the thoughts of you

Because there’s still that hole in my stomach from my pit of bad decisions

And it’s still scary to look at your pictures

And I wonder, what do you think when you look at my frames?

Mom: I don't want any worried phone calls about the content of this poem-- I'm fine.
Dad: If you try to quote me....no, if you MISQUOTE me, I might have to revoke your blog privileges...and who would want that?
Everybody else: More goodness to come in the next few days!

Just A Thought:

To all those professors who insist on making your students' entire grade based off tests, and don't offer extra credit options:

GIVE US STUDY GUIDES....PLEASE.

P.S. Happy 100th Blog Post! Here's some things to help you celebrate the awesomeness that is this blog:

Fishhooks

We’re stuck in a line of repetition,

The highways feel like back roads and the back roads feel like candyland, fake and over explored.

Sometimes I feel like I’ve set my goals too high,

You see, I’m scared of heights

And the higher they are, the higher you set them, the harder you fall on disappointment

And then I’m stuck on the ground left alone with all other things that are broken,

Co-mingled with the ‘could haves’ and ‘would haves’

Watching the days fly by like paper airplanes,

Sometimes I throw out compliments on fish hooks to see what bites back,

The catch of the day is always a bit smaller than you imagined but fresher than what you’ll find at your local grocery store

Sometimes I trip over my ego and fall way past where I climbed from

I’m not an unhappy person, I count my fingers and toes along with my blessings,

Always taking stock in the better thing, the luckier things,

But my words are laced with sorrow and my cabinets are filled with chipped china,

We’re stuck in a ring of repetition

And I’m watching the days fly by like paper air planes

Driving down familiar roads to locate your ghost

Clinging on the could haves and would haves

Always on the precipice of a should have,

Searching for the right words, with the right connotation

Searching for the right feelings with the right kind of actions,

Because this right here, it’s bland

It’s no good

This period of life is begging for volition

It’s begging to be described with the right kind of words,

I’ve been wearing these shackles so long I can barley feel them under my sleeves

Daydreams of you are consistent,

Reality is obviously distant

COMING SOON: Wicked-sweet pictures and videos from Skylar and I's mini-road trip around WA.

Currently

Currently waiting for inspiration, here some more pictures:

























I didn't take this, but it's a great picture of my sassy toga from the weekend! Designed by yours truly with the help of shavy-shav (on the right).



























This isn't very good, but hey, give me a break I'm still learning!


























Chica-Chica-Whaaaaa?

























Artsy?

Peektures

I've recently been suffering from a bit of a writers block, and what I have been writing are pieces that I don't feel like sharing with the whole world. I have, however, been exploring the visual possibilities with my new Flip Camera and Fujifilm. Please enjoy a few of my most recent pictures (no videos today, sorry kids.):

Black Swan and other randomness.....

So many levels to this bad boy. One could, of course, argue that the primary goal of the film was to illustrate the pain behind ballet in an exaggerated and haunting way. However there were so many levels, the most prevalent and evasively effective in my opinion was the whole concept of “reflection”. Black Swan touched on this theme both visually and conceptually. A portion of the film was viewed through reflections, when Nina (Natalie Portman) danced the audience often viewed her via a reflection in a mirror or window, while the camera was focused on the ballet director, Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel) as he watched Nina. Then of course were the reflections interwoven into the story; first, Nina’s life was reflective of the ballet Swan Lake, a component foreshadowed within the first 20 minutes of the film -beginning with her dream that opens the film and Thomas Leroy’s very clear synopsis of the ballet. The rest of the film is guided by Nina’s subconscious and conscious fears reflected and exaggerated by her surroundings and the people that dictate her life. You often see Nina's fears reflected by the actions of her peers. I don't want to say too much because to spoil this plot would be very wrong.

I wouldn't be surprised or disappointed if Portman or Cassel earned some serious recognition from the academy on this one.



I'm gonna end this with a cute picture of a puppy that I took:

Teaser

I just saw Black Swan and really enjoyed it! I'll post a full-fledged review in the next few days or so, until then, enjoy this poem:

Toolbox of Nothing

Society expects us to balance

They want us to humbly walk the line between self-loathing and self-righteousness

Society is giving us signs, pointing us in directions and muddling the ideas that compromise our minds

For years I followed strict moral codes, believing in my gut and following my faith

For years I followed in the footsteps of civilization

Never question, rarely realizing, hardly living

I don’t know what you would call me now

Sometimes I still wake up groggy and out of breath

Trapped by blankets, haunted by my dreams, annoyed with reality

I’m fed up with my lab grown expectations

And my myth defined definitions

Sometimes I wish I could just build a new world from scratch

But I can’t

I lost my hammer, and am out of nails

My tool box is empty

And whose fault is that?